THE SCENE: Today’s “medical analysis” seems to confuse cause with effect when it comes to mixing almonds and alcohol.
THE TEXT: Almonds make the head heavy, bring on impaired vision, and arouse sexual desire. When dried, they are effective against drunkenness, provided one consumes five of them before taking wine. They are known to provoke thirst, because (or so they say) a fox who has swallowed almonds without chewing them will die if there is no water nearby. Almonds make one sleepy, provoke urination, and bring on a woman’s period.
– Gargilius, 3rd Century AD
