THE SCENE: How do you move on with your life after everybody knows you as the guy who farted in front of the queen?
THE TEXT: This earl of Oxford [Edward de Vere], making of his low obeisance to queen Elizabeth, happened to let a fart, at which he was so abashed that he went to travel seven years. On his return the queen welcomed him home and said, “My lord, I had forgot the fart”.
– Brief Lives, John Aubrey, 17th Century AD
“Gisli, who was out in the woods, heard this and answered, “Find some better employment for your farmhands. Here is a man who dares to fight you.” […]
“They warm them to extreme heat, then undress, and after anointing themselves with an acid liquid, they take young branches and lash their bodies.” […]
“Clad in this kind of garment, he secretly entered the magnates’ bedrooms by night in the form of an angel and amazingly deluded their sense or rather their understanding, wide-awake as they were.” […]
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