Humor
Gross-out at Grace
“Surely I would not be able
to overcome the temptation
of thrusting you into myself,
if we were lying alone,
pleasuring one another.” […]
Religion
Britons and Celts
Eat, Drink, and Die Tomorrow
“I have heard tell that the night before the day of battle, the English were very merry, laughing much and enjoying themselves. All night they ate and drank, and never lay down on their beds.” […]
Greek and Roman
Assassination of An Emperor
“He was able to resist from some time by parrying the sword thrusts with the sacred cross, but then he was set upon from all sides, like a wild beast.” […]
Medieval Mentality
Tricks of a Charlatan Priest
“My master raised his hands to heaven, and turned his eyes up until scarcely anything could be seen but the whites. He prayed to the Lord not to require the death of the sinner, but rather to give his life back.” […]
History
The Awkward Priest
“Soon the most kind king, thinking that he did not know how to sing it all, ordered them to help him. When the others sang and the wretched man could not learn the verse from anyone, having sung the responsory he began to chant the Lord’s Prayer in an elaborate way.” […]
Britons and Celts
On the Eve of History
“He is a fool,” said Gurth, “who believes in luck, which no brave man ought to do. No brave man should trust to luck. Every one has his day of death; you say you were born on a Saturday, and on that day also you may be killed.” […]
Medieval Mentality
God Frowns on Wine, But Brandy is OK
“If wine is boiled over a fire, so that it is partly consumed and turns sweet, they are free to drink it without breach of commandment or law.” […]
Human Affairs
The Life and Doings of a Degenerate Priest
“That night the pardoner and the constable, after supper, sat down to play at cards, and they began to quarrel over the game, and make use of bad language. The pardoner called the constable a thief, and the constable called him a liar.” […]
Medieval Mentality
Forbidden Love Must Be Atoned
“Thorstein paid to have a stone cell built for each of them and provided whatever else they needed to live. When the stone cells had been built, at an appropriate time and when everything was completed, they gave up their secular lives together of their own free will.” […]
Britons and Celts
The Death of Walter Raleigh
“He took a pipe of tobacco a little before he went to the scaffold, which some formal persons were scandalized at, but I think ‘twas well and properly done, to settle his spirits.” […]