Humor
Who Cares What the Crows Think?
“These crows are hardly four years old, while I have campaigned against the Saracens for more than twenty years and know the science and means of warfare better than them.” […]
13th Century AD
Humor
An Exchange of Insults Gets Surreal
“You probably do not remember clearly now when you were the witch on Varinsey and said that you wanted to marry a man and you chose me for the role of husband. And afterward you were a Valkyrie in Asgard and all were on the verge of fighting for your sake. I sired nine wolves on you at Laganess, and I was the father of them all.” […]
Humor
An Icelandic Anomaly
“People thought it so remarkable that Kjartan could live so long without meat that they traveled long distances just to look at him.” […]
Viking
Unstoppable on the Battlefield
“Visina said to Starkad, ‘Now Hel’s greed has come upon you, and now you must die, you ogre.’ He answered, ‘But first, you’ll let King Harald’s banner droop,’ and he cut off her left hand. […]
Human Affairs
Out-of-Touch Medieval Elites
“Now one time while they were drinking, the king talked with the women and said: “How do you note the break of day, when the night grows light, if you can not see the heavenly bodies?” The maidservant answered: “This is how I note it: as a child I was in the habit of drinking quite a bit before dawn. And when I stopped doing that, I would still wake up at the same time, and that is my signal.” The king smiled at this reply and said: “That is a poor habit for a king’s daughter.”” […]
Humor
Wrestling With Power
” Kjartan plunged into the river and made for this man who was the best swimmer, and forced him under water at once and held him there for a while before letting go of him. No sooner had they come to the surface than this man seized hold of Kjartan and pulled him down, and they stayed under for what seemed to Kjartan a very reasonable time. They surfaced for a second time, and still they exchanged no words.” […]
Supernatural
Weird Wolves in the Woods
“Sigmund and Sinfjotli put the skins on and could not get them off. And the weird power was there as before: they howled like wolves, both understanding the sounds. They agreed then that they would risk a fight with as many as seven men, but not with more, and that the one being attacked by more would howl with his wolf’s voice.” […]
Supernatural
Prophesy and Pettiness
“Your dream needs no interpretation. You yourself can understand what it is: more than likely, in only a little while, it will come to pass that you’ll be dead, and your enemies will seize the kingdom.” […]
Viking
An Aging Badass
“Elgrim now tried to get away, and spurred his horse; and when Hrut saw this he raised his halberd and drove it between Eldgrim’s shoulder-blades so hard that the coat of mail burst open at the impact and the halberd came out through his chest. Eldgrim fell dead from his horse, as was only to be expected.” […]
History
An End to the Peace
“Then King Harald sent the man named Herleif, and with him the contingent of Germans, to meet King Hring, and had them set up hazel stakes on the battlefield for him and claim the site of the battled, and pronounce the breaking of peace and friendship.” […]