Drag Me to Hell

THE SCENE: Not respecting someone’s dying wish is the #1 cause of getting to dragged to hell by demons.

THE TEXT: In the book of Turpin, Archbishop of Rheims, on the gesta of Charlemagne (whose inseparable helper he was till death), I find it recorded that a knight of Charles’ army, departing this life at Pampeluna, left all his goods to a cleric, his dear friend, to be distributed to the poor. The cleric duly distributed everything else, but for a long time covetously kept back the knight’s horse, which was one of the best is all the army.

Thrice was he warned in sleep by the knight himself not to take his own use what was left to the poor, but against right he paid no heed. A fourth time, therefore, he appeared to the cleric awake and said: “Thou art now judged, and the Lord hath hardened thy heart against repentance; and whereas thou hast trifled with His long-suffering, hast not heeded warning, and hast proudly refused honour to God, thou shalt on the third day after this be caught up alive by devils into the air at the third hour.”

When Charles heard of this message, he encompassed the cleric about with his whole army at the hour named. The clergy took their stand armed with reliquaries and candles, the laity with swords and such weapons as befitted them; yet there broke out a great howling in the air, and the cleric was snatched out of their hands, and on the fourth day after was found among the rocks, three days’ journey off, with every limb broken.

– De Nugis Curialium, Walter Map, 12th Century AD