A Gentleman Wets His Foal (In Bed)

THE SCENE: The vikings were known for their straightforward, blunt demeanor in all manner of dealings… except sex.

THE TEXT: Bosi was of good humor, and flirted a bit, which she did in return. At evening-time they were shown to their beds, and when the light was turned off, Bosi came to where the peasant girl lay, and lifted the bedclothes from her. She asked who was there, and Bosi told her.

“What do you want?” she said.
“I want to water my foal at your wine-well,” he said.
“Do you think it will be possible, my man?” she said; “it is not used to the sort of springhouse that I have.”
“I’ll lead it there,” he said, “and push it deep, if it does not want to drink otherwise.”
“Where is your foal, sweetheart?” she said.
“Between my legs, my love,” he replied, “and you may touch him, but quietly, since he is very shy.”
She took hold of his staff and stroked it and said, “It is a nimble foal, although rather straight at the neck.”
“His head is not very well placed,” he said, “ but his neck curves better, when he has had something to drink.”
“See to it all, now,” she said.
“Lie as it pleases you,” he said, “and keep calm.” He now watered the foal rather generously, so that it dove in completely. The peasant girl was very startled at that, so that she could hardly speak. “Aren’t you going to drown the foal?” she said.
“He shall have as much as he can take,” he said, “since he is often unruly when he is not able to drink when he wants to.” He continued as long as he wanted, and then rested.

The peasant girl wondered where the wetness had come from, which she had in her cleft, since the whole bed was in a lather under her. She said, “Could it be that your foal has drunk more than is good for him, and has vomited up more than he has drunk?”
“Something is wrong with him,” he said, “since he is soft as a lung.”
“He must be ale-sick,” she said, “like other drunkards.”
“That is certain,” he said. They enjoyed themselves now as they wished, and the peasant girl was sometimes on top, and sometimes underneath, and she said that she had never ridden such an easy-going foal as this one.

– The Saga of Bosi and Herraud, 14th Century